


Accidental Songs

by myrifique



Category: Disney RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-20
Updated: 2009-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-04 17:14:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myrifique/pseuds/myrifique
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A summer of filming, roadtrips and bad motels. And Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Accidental Songs

**Author's Note:**

  * For [th_esaurus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/th_esaurus/gifts).



> Dear th_esaurus, happy Yuletide! I hope I quieted my inner fluff author enough. Enjoy!
> 
> Many thanks to my betas, and I'm sorry for being such a hardhead and ignoring most of your awesome comments.

It's been a fun ten minutes of browsing the gossip blogs during the Jonas Brothers' weekly "Damage Limiting" meeting. Kevin is pretty much ready to call it a day when Joe says "Oh, here, there's one. 'Kevin Jonas postpones wedding once more'."

"Great, there we are," Kevin says quietly.

"Well, it was obviously too easy - not a single mention of Miley and just the one rumor of Joe and Demi dating? It couldn't be," Nick answers, looking tired.

"How can you postpone it if you never set a date?" Joe asks. Kevin tries to find something witty to say in return. It doesn't come super easily.

The thing is, Kevin did postpone it. In his mind, at least. It's not that Dani isn't awesome anymore - she totally is - but he kind of thought that once he got married, he'd stop touring and making movies and stuff. You know, that he would basically quit the business to be a respectable family man. But, as it turns out, touring is fun. And he thinks he'd miss it. So he's been accepting project after project, never able to say no to Nick's excited eyes or his father's stern look. Giving his all at every show because he knows it's probably going to end soon. It's been a nice rush, he's not going to lie. And Dani has been supportive, so that's good, probably. Though he's not sure if it counts as supportive when they even don't really talk about getting married anymore. Or talk much at all, actually.

"I hope this isn't still about the best man dilemma. Nick has agreed the other day that I'd be the most awesome best man ever," Joe says seriously. Nick rolls his eyes with his usual "I'm not dignifying that with a response, _Joseph_" look.

"Well, there's not much that we can do about this one, except for driving to Vegas to get you hitched," Nick says, businesslike.

"That sounds like fun, do we want to do that?" Joe asks.

"Yeah, well, your _mom_ sounds like fun, but we don't want to do that either," Kevin mumbles before thinking about it. "Can this conversation be over already?"

\---  


When the offer comes for the movie a few weeks later, Kevin is pretty sure his father is going to refuse. After all, it's always been "You get the three brothers or you don't get any". But this movie actually looks pretty fun. It's got Zac Efron in it. Zac Efron is cool, and relatively wholesome. Caribbean sexy pictures aside. Not that he looked at those. Much. It was kind of hot, okay. Anyway, Kevin finds himself pushing the subject a little.

"I just think it'd be a good opportunity for me," he says. His father listens, his face carefully blank. "I mean, Nick is on his solo tour right now, so I'm not sure if the usual 'three of them or none of them' argument works here."

"A good opportunity? Well, maybe. But I thought the role looked like the usual 'funny sidekick' you're already playing often."

Kevin doesn't mind. He likes the funny sidekick stuff. It helps if the main hero is cool, too. It's kind of like being friends with the cool guys at high school (which he wasn't). Some of their cool splashes on you, too. Or at least that's what it seems like in books and movies. And this is a movie, so.

He must make a less rambly point to his dad than to his mind, because Kevin Sr agrees, and just like that, he's going to be in a movie with Zac Efron.

\---  


When the first day of shooting comes, Kevin is ready. He picked up his outfit days ago, adding a manscarf in passing when he happily realized it was a bit chilly outside. He doesn't feel the least bit stressed out about his role, his lines, and certainly not about Zac Efron. 

He arrives on set early. Today's just a rehearsal day, and they're going to do a table read of the movie. He comes into the room confident, and just about jumps out of his skin when Zac is already there, drinking his coffee, looking as cool as you please. Zac raises his head and smiles. Kevin tries not to look behind him because he is pretty sure there's no one else Zac could be smiling to. 

"Hi," he says. 

Zac says "Hi!", like he's very happy to see Kevin there. Like he didn't expect him. Even though you know, Kevin is only playing his best friend. Who is in half the scenes with him.

"So... this is the right place then." Kevin shuffles on his feet a bit, unsure if he should sit down. Or where, if he does. It's a big decision. What if there are unspoken actor rules about places at the table? Should the romantic leads sit right next to each other, even if they spend half the movie separated? He's about to start a quiet round of eeney-meeny-miney-mo in his head when Zac pulls the chair beside him, inviting Kevin with his smiley smile.

"I'm so glad we're doing this together, I've been wanting to meet you," Zac says. Kevin can't believe it.

"Yeah," Kevin says, suddenly very nervous. "It's like a ... Disney reunion or something. Not that you're associated with Disney anymore," he adds hastily. "Just, you know."

Zac raises his eyebrow at that, scrunching his face a little bit, like he's not sure if he's supposed to laugh. Kevin feels like banging his head on the table but instead laughs a little to cover it. Luckily, the room is starting to fill in with other people, and he doesn't have to face Zac or his own uncoolness for much longer.

While the other actors sit down noisily around the table, Zac leans towards Kevin and says, "We should go get coffee sometimes" with his mouth all close to Kevin's ear. Kevin figures Zac is probably a very method actor who wants to make sure he nails that best friend thing.

He agrees. Obviously. He wouldn't want to ruin the movie or anything.

\---  


So it turns out, Zac is a good actor.  Even when there is no dancing, no singing, and no basketball involved. Kevin thinks watching him act is probably pretty educational, like acting lessons for free (actually, he's even getting paid, so, bonus). That's the main reason he's been staying behind when he's not filming. He likes just hanging out on set and watching Zac. For education's sake.

Then one day, between takes, Zac comes up to him and says "I wish I could be doing this scene with you instead."

"Why?"

"I don't know, I like the way we play off each other." Kevin tries not to think "that's dirty" or anything like that and to focus mainly on the happy warm feeling that's spreading all over his body. Because it's nice. He's pretty sure he's blushing, or maybe it's just really hot in here.

"Thanks," he says. "I like acting with you too."

After that, they start doing little scenes together, rehearsing and running lines. Zac even brings a Shakespeare play to his trailer one day, and they goof around with old accents. It's generally pretty awesome. Kevin knows he'll probably never be the greatest actor, but it feels good to work on the craft anyway. Like he's really learning, just by talking with Zac.  


\---  


Halfway through the shoot, there's a break for a couple of days. They're going to film a big part of the movie in Canada, and the crew needs a couple of days to set everything up. Kevin was looking forward to the respite - and, quite possibly, to shopping. So when Zac rings his doorbell on his first day off, he's a bit surprised. He opens the door in his pajamas. Zac says, "We should drive there."

Luckily Kevin had already swallowed his orange juice, or else there would probably have been a comedic spit-take. "Drive? To Canada? That's going to take like ... a really long time."

"One day and fourteen hours," Zac says cheerfully. "I looked it up. And that's just if we drive non-stop. I printed this little map, look."

"You know," Kevin says, feeling half like he's explaining to a small child and half like he's the small child who doesn't get it, "we could just take a plane."

"What! You're no fun. We need to do it by car, it's the rockstar way. Roadtrip!" Zac kind of does this thing where he punches the air with his fist and somehow remains cool while doing so. Some things are just not fair.

"Actually, this might come in as a surprise, but I am kind of a rockstar-"

"Popstar," Zac interrupts.

"-and we do have a plane. That we take. All the time."

At this Zac starts to look all disappointed, like he's probably about to say _Well then, nevermind_ in a sad tone with his sad mouth in his sad face. So Kevin hurriedly says "Okay." Zac's sad face is possibly his kryptonite. He tries not to think about that too much. Luckily, he seems to have chosen the right answer as Zac does the thing with the fist again. This time his excitement does look kind of dorky, probably just so Zac can show Kevin there is justice in this world.

"We're taking my car," Zac adds. "And sleeping in really bad motels."

"Well, obviously," Kevin says. "Let's do it. Rockstar style."

"I'll even let you pick the music. Because of your popstar status. All right, let's go!"

Kevin is on his way down the driveway when he notices that he's barefoot and that there is no way he's crossing the country without at least three pieces of luggage. Zac smiles good-naturedly at this and hangs out on Kevin's bed while he packs, commenting on his choices and only asking him to hurry up twice.

\---  


They pack all of their stuff in the trunk of the car and Kevin gets in the passenger seat eagerly. He's just a little sad he didn't have time to make a mix CD, though when he mentions that, Zac laughs this little laugh, like he often does. The one that makes Kevin feel both happy and a little ridiculous. Zac just plugs in his iPod and asks Kevin to be the DJ for the ride.

At first they talk about the movie, and their characters, and what they would do on a roadtrip, but soon they're talking about everything from music to people and to look how green are the trees. Kevin isn't so used to talking this freely to someone he's not related to, someone he hasn't known since they were born. It's unexpected, but, you know, nice. They even gossip for a bit, Zac kidding around about Nick and Miley, jokingly offering his services to Nick if he needs help in the "how to be a good boyfriend" department. Which actually wouldn't be such a bad idea, Kevin reflects.

Of course, Kevin doesn't think so much about how awesome a boyfriend Zac must be when they get out for food at a gas station and his eyes catch a Tiger Beat with "VANESSA'S NEW BOYFRIEND" in big pink letters on the cover. He stares at it for a while before Zac calls after him, and he grabs it quickly, throwing it on the counter with the chips and the drinks, paying for it all in a weird, distant state.

"Dude, are you okay?" Zac asks him when he comes in the car.

"Did you know Vanessa has a new boyfriend?" Kevin asks in this tiny high voice, not feeling his manliest.

Zac sighs. "Yes, I know. She's got a thing for dating costars, I suppose."

Kevin opens the magazine - "You bought that?" Zac says incredulously - and reads up on Alex Pettyfer, who was apparently in _Beastly_ with Vanessa. He closes the magazine and looks at Zac, who's concentrating on the road and looking decidedly not that upset. "Zac, are you okay?"

"Yes, Kevin, I'm fine."

Kevin raises his eyebrow and Zac laughs. "Seriously! We already knew it was over way before she met Alex. These things just happen, Kev. I didn't want to be that guy who married his high school sweetheart anyway."

"You do know East High wasn't really a school, right?"

Zac laughs at this, looking delightedly at Kevin. "You actually know the name of the school in _High School Musical_?"

Kevin pauses, stuck. "N-no. Because that would not be cool."

Zac smiles at him and, well. He does seem okay, anyway. "Is this why we're doing this roadtrip? To take your mind off things?"

"Clearly. If my life were a movie, this would be the big character-building moment, with maybe a Shins song playing to boot. But mostly it's because you're awesome." Zac looks at him as he says that last part, and Kevin knows that if this was a movie it would bother him, how the driver isn't watching the road and that's not realistic, but right now he just can't bring himself to care.

\---  


The rest of the trip isn't very eventful. There's talking. ("How is it possible that you're not everybody's favorite Jonas Brother?" Zac asks a laughing Kevin. "You're certainly mine." Kevin answers "You haven't met Nick" and certainly doesn't blush.)

There's listening to music. Kevin is adamant that they need to listen to _Illinoise_ in Illinois, to which Zac says "Aw, that's adorable." Kevin puts that part of the conversation somewhere in the back of his head, to keep company to a lot of other stuff Zac did that's starting to hang around back there.

There's silence, too, because thirty-eight hours is a long time. But it feels all right. The landscapes moving around them make the mood comfortable, and the quiet is actually kind of nice.

At some point they sleep somewhere in Colorado and the motel only has one room left. Like something out of a TV show where the two reluctant partners are forced to sleep in the same room, isn't that hilarious? (Needless to say, Kevin's brain goes into something of an overdrive.) Zac jokes around, offers Kevin the bed closer to the window with much flourish, and Kevin thinks to himself that he's silly to freak out so much when Zac falls down on his bed and is asleep immediately.

Zac doesn't snore. He breathes slowly and prettily, like you'd think he would. Kevin thinks that he'd like to fall asleep to that sound every night. Then he puts that thought at the back of his mind, with the others.

When they get there, the crew smiles at Zac's depictions of their so-called antics, filming resumes, Dani calls, and everything goes back to normal. Mostly.

\---  


Apparently filming a movie doesn't take that long. After three weeks of early wake-up calls and late nights in a surprisingly warm Canada, people are cheering at the director's last "Cut!" and there's a nice buzz in the air. The wrap party is at this little restaurant near the set, and when Kevin gets there, there's people filling it to the brim, eating and drinking champagne and generally looking merry. For a guy in the industry, Kevin is pretty unused to parties, so he's relieved to spot Zac, who's talking excitedly to somebody, his arm around Lauren. Everybody seems to hang on his every word, like the whole room gravitates towards him. He's moving his free arm around a lot, waving his champagne and probably saying something really interesting.  

Kevin looks at him for a while, sheltered by the crowd. He's starting to get a little antsy and wonders if he should have stayed home when Zac catches his eye. He stops talking, and people are still having fun around him, but for some reason Zac seems really intent on looking right at Kevin. Like he really needs to commit his image to memory. Kevin wishes Zac would wink or just look somewhere else, because this is starting to freak him out a little. He averts his eyes for a second, feeling his cheeks burning, and when he looks back Zac is saying something in Lauren's ear, untangling himself from her, and he seems to be coming his way. Kevin swallows. 

"Kevin," Zac says with a smile. "Here, have a drink." Another glass of champagne seems to materialize in Zac's hand and he gives it to Kevin, who considers saying he doesn't drink, but thinks better of it - it's just one glass, whatever.

"Congratulations on the movie," Kevin says. "I'll, uh, I'll drink to it."

Zac tinks his glass on Kevin's and says "To us and our awesomeness! And to new awesome friendships!" Kevin thinks he's probably a little tipsy. Especially when Zac wraps his arm around his shoulders like he just did with Lauren, emptying his glass in one swoop. Kevin shifts around a bit, and Zac throws him a look, with a bit of uncertainty in it. It just seems so out of place that Kevin feels like he needs to reassure him, and that's how he ends up slipping his arm around Zac's back. Zac smiles at this, a little laugh on his mouth as he brings Kevin closer and tells him "You're my favorite Jonas Brother", kissing his forehead with very wet lips.

And it's just. Maybe this champagne is stronger than he thought. But it just feels so good, being this close to Zac, like he has this humming inside him that's filling his whole body, ("Oh God, please don't let me burst into song," he thinks). He takes another sip and smiles at Zac. He feels hot and cold at the same time, and Zac smells really nice, and he has a really pretty smile and really really pretty eyes, and suddenly Kevin wishes they were back in Zac's car listening to ridiculous music and alone alone alone.

But the director arrives and grabs Zac and soon they're both caught in a whirlwind of people, and the moment's lost and the movie's over and Kevin has no idea when he'll see Zac again.

\---  


The movie is scheduled to come out five months after they're done shooting, for a big July release. Kevin gets kind of moody thinking about how far away that seems. The first few days he's back home, he spends a lot of time watching boring things on TV, and if he was drinking he'd probably have a coffee table full of beer bottles by now. As it is, it's mostly diet soda. Nick isn't back home yet from his tour with the Administration, so Joe sits with him often, unusually subdued. He'd be glad for the company except they both mostly wait around a lot, sometimes half-heartedly writing songs with lots of lyrics like "You're gone" in it. They're not really used to the free time.

"Why don't you call Danielle?" Joe asks one day. (One day where there's just 127 days left before the premiere. Not that he's counting. Zac hasn't called. He hasn't either.)

"I don't know, I don't feel like it," Kevin says, his eyes still on the TV.

Joe raises an eyebrow and looks at him intently. "Don't string her along, all right? She's a nice girl."

"Yeah, Joe, because you are so clearly the man when it comes to relationships." Kevin tries to play it off as normal kidding around with his brother, but he sounds pretty pissed and Joe doesn't push it. And then Nick calls and he's coming home, full of ideas for songs and they're going back to rehearsing and recording, and Kevin thinks _finally_, he'll be able to think of other things than champagne and forehead kisses.

\---  


Days turns into weeks into months, quicker than he would have expected. They have a new album ready, conveniently coming out a few weeks after the movie premiere. He doesn't think about Zac. Well, not more than 10% of his days. (Maybe 15%.) And that's certainly not why he gets more and more nervous as the premiere date looms.

Kevin is pretty proud of his poker face on the day of the premiere. He gets ready with Joe and Nick, arranging Joe's tie even if he's sure Joe doesn't need it anymore, and hops into the car. This is easy. He's done this a hundred times.

Still, he kind of expected the rush that comes to his head when he gets out on the red carpet and Zac is there, smiling at the flashes, posing with Lauren. It's been a long five months, and it's nice to see an old friend again, that's all. Zac seems to think so too, his face lighting up when he sees Kevin, beckoning him closer with a wave of his hand. Kevin leaves Nick and Joe behind, and he poses with Zac and Lauren, because it's what co-stars do. The noise is deafening, and Kevin doesn't want to mess up his smile by talking, but he still whispers "Missed you" in Zac's ear. Zac looks at him like Kevin just told him where to find a pirate treasure, like he's happy and excited and mostly very surprised. Zac's arm holds Kevin a little closer for the rest of the pictures. It's a feeling Kevin would live in if he could.

They sit next to each other for the movie. It's exciting to finally see it; Kevin didn't do too bad a job, he thinks. Zac is great, and half the theater falls in love with him twenty minutes in. That's certainly what it looks like at the afterparty, where everybody is coming up to him to tell him how good he was and flirt a little in passing. Kevin tries not to mind, especially since Zac seems to keep close to him. Like the whole room is following Zac, but Zac is following Kevin.

So it probably shouldn't come as such a surprise when he washes his hands in the restroom and Zac appears beside him. "Hey," he says.

"Hey," Zac answers.

They look at each other for a while, grinning stupidly. Kevin is about to say something on the movie so they don't fall into awkwardness but Zac walks closer to him, and hugs him. Not a "you're a bro" slap-on-the-back hug either, he just presses his whole body to Kevin's and tangles his arms behind Kevin's back.

Kevin feels like he's finally breathing. He melts into Zac, holding him too, his head in Zac's neck, and Zac smells so good, and Zac says "I missed you too" and Kevin is feeling so many things at once he might explode. "You didn't call and you're getting married and I didn't-" and Kevin doesn't know what to say, so he kisses Zac and hopes everything will go away. Zac kisses back instantly, intensely, like he's both happy and very sad. He slides a hand to Kevin's neck, his fingers tangled in his hair. Kevin holds on to him.

The door opens and Kevin hears giggling. He lets Zac go momentarily before whirling around, feeling his cheeks burning. David and Selena are there, David kissing Selena's neck while she giggles. They seem pretty oblivious and Kevin thanks the lord for small mercies. Zac clears his throat and David stops kissing Selena, looking up and not very embarrassed, though Selena manages to look shy. "Mister Henrie, Miss Gomez," says Zac, keeping a straight face. "Do carry on, we were just leaving." He grabs Kevin's hand and they get out, exhilarated.

"I wonder if the Grauman's Theater people are aware of the prime making-out spot their restrooms are," Zac says. "I feel like I should call them. A few more couches would be great."

"Well, you know," Kevin says, "people will make out everywhere."

"Will they now." Zac says and then he's the one kissing Kevin and holding him against the wall and Kevin feels too elated to worry about people.

\---  


The next day, Kevin wakes up to the sound of his phone beeping. He has this feeling, like he's trying to get out of his own body. It's strange. He picks up the phone blindly, smiling because it might be Zac.

It's not.

> From: Selena  
> Anything u want to tell me, Jonas? ;)  
> 8:14am 31-JUL-10

He freaks out for a second before he remembers that Selena is pretty awesome and that she's probably not going to tell the world about catching Zac Efron and Kevin Jonas making out in a bathroom. Especially since she definitely did some making out of her own. He smiles as he replies. 

> From: Kevin  
> Feel like a 14-yr-old girl :D  
> 8:17am 31-JUL-10

And he does. He keeps replaying the moments from yesterday night - not nearly long enough moments, since there was a party to go to and press to avoid. But still. He gets a lot of mileage from the way Zac's eyes kind of half-close when he kisses.

> From: Selena  
> Know the feeling  
> 8:19am 31-JUL-10

He smiles and starts to get up, too amped up to sleep anymore. His phone beeps one last time.

> From: Selena  
> Take care of urself  
> 8:26am 31-JUL-10

He tries not to worry too much about it because he knows that by himself she means his fiancée and his career and, well. He's busy thinking about Zac Efron kissing him against a wall right now, thank you very much.

\---  


The sad thing is, Danielle is a pretty awesome girl. (Obviously. He wouldn't have dated her and seriously considered marrying her if she wasn't.) But he still goes to her house and tells her that he's a little confused, but that he's pretty sure they can't get married anymore. Because he kissed a boy, though he doesn't mention that last part. She's annoyingly great about it. She says she understands, that she felt it coming for a while, and she smiles with her eyes a little shiny. Kevin hates himself, like, a lot. He hugs her and feels her shaking a little in his arms and kisses her forehead. He wishes she had started bitching and writing Potential Breakup Songs so he could feel a little less disgusting, but he should know better.

He listens to her reassuring him that she won't come out to the media, or write songs, or be a Video Girl, and when she says "Maybe being Mrs Kevin Jonas wasn't the best financial plan anyway" with a strangled laugh in her voice, he feels his eyes well up. Because it was nice and it was easy and it's gone now.

She gives him the ring back and he tells her to keep it, but she shakes her head and he doesn't push it.

When he takes the plane back to LA, he wants to call Zac. A lot. It's already been a couple of days, and Zac hasn't called, but that's a thing, isn't it, the three-days rule? So he picks up his phone and dials before he can stop himself.

"Hi!" Zac answers, like he knows who's calling, like he's really happy about it. Kevin can't really believe it so he stumbles through the usual greetings, before blurting out "I just broke up with Danielle."

"Oh, man, I am so sorry," is Zac's immediate reply. He seems to mean it, and Kevin is a little thrown off.

"You are?"

"What- of course I am. You were engaged and all, that's got to be hard to deal with. The media is going to be all over this."

"Right," Kevin says. The media. He didn't realize it, but Kevin was expecting Zac to be more... happy. But he just seems to have genuine concern for a friend and Kevin wants to scream "It was for you, it's all for you" to get a reaction out of him. Suddenly the world seems to shift from under Kevin, and Zac isn't his like he thought he was. He feels very lonely. "So, we should see each other sometimes soon," he says with a strangled voice.

"Definitely. Soon."

And just like that, he hangs up and Kevin is alone again. He looks out the window and decides he's allowed to wallow for a while.

\---  


"Soon" doesn't materialize. He comes back home, then leaves for tour, and days and weeks and months pass. Everything that happened with Zac is kind of blurry in his head, something like a dream. Sometimes he thinks about it and the feeling is suddenly so intense, he'll stop moving, close his eyes and remember Zac's body pressing against his and what he thought he saw in his eyes. But most of the time he starts to think he imagined it, that there was just a filming friendship and a little bit of horniness between them. And he broke up with his fiancée because of it.

At least he doesn't read any gossip about Zac having a new girlfriend (or, god help him, a new boyfriend). And he resorts to IMDb to find out that Zac is involved in four projects at the same time, probably busy seducing everybody on every film set in Hollywood.

So, that's that, and he's not going to think about it any more. Really.

\---  


Christmas used to be a big affair in the Jonas household. At first they were singing and listening to Dad at church before the huge dinner back at home, and in later years there was usually some big concert event to perform at. But this year they just finished touring and without saying it, they all feel like taking a break. Dad turns down offers with a smile and Mom announces to them that they both rented cottages somewhere North. "Where it snows," she says, her eyes sparkling, "and it'll be just the six of us."

"Dad and I will stay in one with Frankie, and you'll be in another one, so you can play Hello or drums until two in the morning or whatever it is that you do," she says.

"Thanks, Mom," Nick says with a kiss on her cheek. "And it's Halo."

Suddenly Kevin feels warm inside, like Christmas was already here and they were all hanging out around the fire. "It's going to be great, Mom, awesome idea," he adds as Joe bounces around to express his happiness.

When they get there, there's already a ton of snow. The cars get by on the tiny road and park in front of two little houses in the middle of nowhere. As soon as they're there, Frankie jumps in the snow, taking his role as the youngest very seriously. Kevin brings his bags to their house, removes his favorite pants to put on warmer clothes (and to keep them from getting wet, he's not made of stone) and joins the rest of his family in making snowmen and throwing snowballs and building forts.

\---  


Mom somehow managed to make this gigantic turkey and all of the usual Christmas dinner goodies in this tiny cottage kitchen. They've been sitting and enjoying it for ten minutes when the doorbell rings. Frankie jumps out, as he does, and Nick barely stifles a groan as they all exchange wondering glances.

"Hi Zac!" Kevin hears Frankie say. He's pretty sure he heard wrong - maybe Frankie said hi to a man high on Prozac? Or that guy from the ads who plays Mac? But then-

"Hey, Frank the Tank, merry Christmas." Kevin doesn't think he would mistake that voice. 

"Come in! We're eating turkey!" Frankie adds in his excited little-kid voice, and Kevin is rooted to his chair, stuck wondering if he's somehow reliving last night's dream or if his insides suddenly turned into withering snakes.

Zac comes in, smiling, looking like he crashes small family gatherings all the time. Everybody seems happy to see him, Mom gets up immediately to fix him a plate ("Thank you, Denise, but that's not necessary, I don't mean to disturb-" before she shushes him and disappears into the kitchen) and Nick and Joe give him manly hugs ("How did you find us, man?" Nicks asks and Zac says "I have my sources", all cool guy) and Dad shakes his hand warmly and Kevin is at the end of the table and Zac is coming beside him and what is he- how is he supposed to react- what- His brain is blanking but Zac is smiling, saying "Kevin" like he's the only person in the world, and Kevin rises up too and wraps his arms around Zac, trying to keep the hug manly and not to dissolve into it. "Zac," he answers, thanking God that his voice doesn't squeak. And he hates that after seven months, holding this boy still feels like the only reason why he's alive.

He goes away too soon, it's too cold, Kevin wants him back and wants to _touch touch touch_ him. But Mom brings Zac a plate, and everybody sits down. Zac says something about being sorry to disturb once again, and how great an idea it is to go so far away from everything. The conversation turns to things that aren't what Kevin would prefer to talk about with Zac - which are like, making out, and also why didn't you call I was waiting for you - and he's probably going to scream before the dinner ends.

He doesn't, because dinner does end. And Mom says "Kevin, why don't you go fix Zac a bed in your room?" And Zac answers "Sure, let's go, I'll help you." And then they're alone, outside, all wrapped up in their winter clothes.

"So, hi," Zac grins.

"Hi," Kevin answers, and he blushes. He's so stupidly in love. He's actually feeling a little angry about it. They walk around the path to their house, Kevin's hand trailing along on the snow beside him. Before he knows it he has a big snowball in his hand, and they're still not really talking. He adds despair to his earlier anger and decides to _do_ something about it, and that's when he grabs Zac by the collar and drops the snow in his coat. Zac gasps and tries to wiggle the cold out of his back and before Kevin knows it he gets a face-full of snow.

They fight for a few minutes, and Kevin knows he isn't very subtle when he ends up grabbing Zac, pulling him over him. Zac looks beautiful, his cheeks pink from the cold and his eyes bright. When he brings his mouth close to Kevin's he thinks _finally_ and goes to catch it. Zac's mouth is hot in all the surrounding cold. Kevin wants to live in there. Zac gets closer to him, rolling them around a little in the snow, deepening the kiss. Their tongues tangle and Kevin thinks he cries a little, but it's probably just the snow. He just- he missed Zac so much.

Somehow, they manage to get inside, kissing all the way. Zac takes Kevin's coat off, and he looks at him in a way that makes Kevin feel like he's wearing nothing at all. Zac kisses him again, shrugging his own coat off before he holds Kevin close, his hands running all over his back. Kevin gasps at the cold when Zac touches the skin just where his t-shirt ends and Zac whispers "Maybe we could go to your room" and Kevin's heart starts doing a crazy drum routine.

In his room, Kevin takes off his ring and Zac smiles a little before entwining his fingers with Kevin's. It feels different without the ring, like their hands are closer or something. They're sitting side by side, Zac's head resting on Kevin's shoulder. Kevin kisses Zac's hair, it feels soft against his mouth. At this Zac raises his head to kiss Kevin once more, and then Kevin is not sure how it happens, but they're both lying down and Zac is on top of him. Kevin wonders if he should feel crushed, but it just feels nice, like he's waited a really long time for Zac and finally he has him closer than he ever dreamed of. He says something about their clothes being wet from the snow, and Zac laughs a little before undressing. His skin is soft. Kevin pretty much wants every inch of his body touching Zac.

They're down to their boxers when Zac's finger gets inside the elastic, making patterns on Kevin's hip. "Is this okay?" he whispers, and Kevin nods and then he's naked. With a naked boy. In his bed. Weirdly, he doesn't panic too much about it. Zac moves a little between Kevin's legs, and they're touching, and Zac brings his hand around both of them and Kevin has never felt anything this intense, ever.

After a couple of hours, the sheets are a little sticky and Kevin knows how bright Zac's eyes get when he... he knows the brightest Zac's eyes can get. He wraps himself around Zac and listens to him falling asleep slowly. He doesn't sleep. He wants to keep every moment with this boy, because he knows he's going to go away soon and he'll have to live on those memories for another six months.

\---  


The morning after, they eat breakfast all together. Zac announces to the table that he's sorry, that this was a very awesome Christmas Eve and morning, but he's not going to disturb them further. He's going back to LA for some reason that Kevin doesn't listen to. 

Everybody goes outside to say goodbye to Zac. It's snowing. Zac holds Kevin for probably a couple of seconds more than the others - Kevin mostly notices how Zac whispers "I love you" in his ear. He mouths "Me too" in Zac's hair, and then he's going, getting in his car with a cheery wave. And as the snow falls around Kevin, he knows he's probably going to wait for this boy his entire life.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [All You Wanted in Your Wildest Dreams](https://archiveofourown.org/works/164412) by [myrifique](https://archiveofourown.org/users/myrifique/pseuds/myrifique)




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